


Just Friends

by queenforayear



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fluff, Mutual Pining, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-21
Updated: 2016-11-30
Packaged: 2018-08-23 18:18:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8337859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenforayear/pseuds/queenforayear
Summary: Five times you said, "We're just friends."





	1. "Let's Get Outta Here"

**Author's Note:**

> Horror movies and late night treats.

 

“Bucky?”

His eyes turned to look at yours. “Yeah, doll?”

“This movie is a little intense, isn’t it?” Your grip on the pillow tightened when the eerie music began. You had made the unfortunate mistake of letting Natasha pick what movie to watch. Naturally, since Halloween was fast approaching, she picked _Insidious_ . And when you objected, Clint, shook his head and said you owed them since you had chosen _Sharknado_ last time.

“I’d say so,” Bucky answered. “You have a death grip on that pillow and we’re only ten minutes into the movie.” A smirk played on his lips, but disappeared when you shot him a glare.

Throughout the first half of the movie, quiet gasps and obscenities would escape your lips but your eyes- albeit squinted- remained on the screen. You visibly jumped from your seat at one point and cursed your friends for being able to cover their fright using their poker face.

You muttered, “Oh my god. I hate this movie.”

“C’mon, don’t wimp out yet. We’re not at the scary part yet,” Natasha grinned.  Beside you, Bucky chuckled and draped his arm around you.

His arm squeezed around you throughout the movie. You can’t tell if he did that to comfort you or if he is just as scared as you are. Either way, you lean into him.

Once the movie ended and your heart settled into its normal pace, you said, “Thank you, Nat. I’m not going to be able to sleep.”

“Well, since you say you won't be able to sleep,” Nat smiled wickedly and reached for the remote,” I’m putting on _Insidious 2_.”

Before you can object for the second time that evening, Clint pointed a finger at you and reminded, “ _Sharknado_. You haven't suffered enough.”

“The pillow she was clutching begs to differ,” Bucky said. Despite this, Nat pressed the play button and once again the ominous music began. Bucky stood to his feet and offered his hand. “Let’s get outta here, doll.”

Nat quirked an eyebrow and gave you a knowing smile. You took Bucky’s hand, grabbed your jacket from the coat rack by the door, and let him lead you out into the bright city night. “Where are we going?” You asked curiously, tightening the jacket closer to your body. 

“To that donut shop down the street you like so much,” he said, shrugging on his sweater. “It’s my treat.”

“You’re so nice to me,” you said. And he was.The ever so perceptive Natasha Romanoff was the first to notice how he was around you. Although he claimed to have taken an instant liking towards you, he was quiet and distant at first. As his trust in you grew, so did the friendship. 

“I know,” he said as you approached the 24-hour donut shop. His hand surged forward to push the entrance door open. “I’ve gone soft.”

You were greeted by chiming bells and the shop's employee. Bucky ordered a dozen donuts and gave you a glance that said _No, they are not all for you_. You sat down, with the dozen in a pink cardboard box, at the booth by the window.

“Until you,” you said as you bit down on the chocolate donut, “I had never known someone who liked those nasty-looking plain donuts you eat. I didn't even know they made them."

“You see these pearly whites?” He grinned, showing you his teeth. “Unlike yours, no cavities.”

“Hey! It was only one time,” you said, failing to stop the laughter that erupted from your lips. Afterwards, Bucky ordered two cups of coffee and the conversation continued to flow until the time neared one in the morning. And as you made your way back into the tall building that you called home, you said, “Next time, it’s my treat.”

“I’ll consider it,” he said as you walked onto the elevator. You grabbed the pink box from his hands and said you would leave it on the counter in the kitchen. “Save some for the team, okay?”

“I won’t make any promises,” you said as you got off the elevator. “Goodnight, Buck.”

“Goodnight.” And as the elevator doors closed he smiled, “Try not to think of the old lady from the movie!”

“God damn it,” you muttered as you entered the kitchen. You swore to yourself that from now on, you'd be the one picking what to watch.  

“Late night?” The sudden sound of Natasha’s voice made you gasp and you nearly dropped the box in your hands.

“You scared me!” You placed the donuts on the counter and said, “And yeah, we lost track of time.”

“Oh? You and Bucky?” She asked suggestively, a sly grin on her lips.

“We’re just friends, Nat.”

“If you say so.”

“I do say so,” you countered. “It’s too late… well, early for this. I’m going to sleep.”

“Don’t lie to yourself,” she chuckled as you turned away and made your way up to your room. “Or the old lady will appear!”

"God damn it!"

 


	2. The Lovey Look

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Calloused hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dress inspired by [ here ](http://image.made-in-china.com/2f0j00UFnaCVPghQqj/Sheer-Sleeves-Mermaid-Mother-Gown-Red-Lace-Evening-Dress-E201685.jpg)

By the time you emerged from your room, your teammates were downstairs enjoying the event Tony was hosting.

You squared your shoulders, shaking loose the breath from your chest. You crossed the hall and went into the elevator. Each second it descended brought you closer to the hum of the music.

The doors divided, flooding your senses with bright light and lively music. It was no less than you expected from Tony.

Wanda, who was waiting near the elevator for your arrival, walked towards you. “Well, if your superpowers didn’t already scare the living hell out of me, they certainly do now,” she said, greeting you with a kiss on the cheek. “You took your time getting ready. I thought you weren’t going to show, fire girl.”

“I hope I was worth the wait.” you said and smiled at the nickname she coined you. You had to admit, your pyrokinesis was a big reason of why you had chosen this dress. You had barely started to embrace your gifts despite the trouble they caused you at times. You admired the black velvet dress your friend wore. “You look amazing. I’m going to need to raid your closet.”

“First, let’s get a drink in you,” Wanda winked.

“You read my mind, Maximoff”  you said, making way across the dance hall to the bar where Steve and Bucky were nursing their drinks.

“You two look very pretty this evening,” Steve said as a way of greeting. Unlike Bucky, he leaned his side against the counter and faced the scene of the party.  

Bucky, looking alarmingly handsome, turned in his bar stool and visibly stilled as he took in your dress.

The red gown hugged every curve and hollow before pooling at your feet, its tight sleeves and front adorned with lacework. The neckline skimmed just below your collarbones, sheer save for the tendrils of embroidered red lace creeping up towards the shoulders.

Bucky wriggled the collar of his white dress shirt and cleared his throat. “You ladies look lovely,” he said with cool observation.

“I hope you brought your dancing shoes, Wanda, because I feel like dancing,” Steve smiled a charming smile and offered his hand to her.

“So long as you don’t mind my heels stepping on your toes,” Wanda joked. She took his hand and let him lead her to the dance floor.

You didn’t notice Bucky’s eyes graze over you as you ordered a drink. Up, then down- from the hair you had swept back; to the winged eyeliner that swept along your upper eyelid. You looked at him in time to see his eyes slide south, and linger for a few moments. You could have sworn desire flickered there behind his eyes.

His gaze slowly met yours, and he looked flustered as he realized you had caught him.

“You look… very beautiful,” Bucky said quietly. “Any guy would be lucky to dance with you, doll.”

You smiled, waving a hand towards him: his hair was slicked back and his form-fitting black suit showed off his powerful shoulders. He even wore the red tie he knew you liked so much. You said, a bit hoarsely, “You look really handsome, Buck.”

An understatement.

“Ah, this old thing?” Bucky chuckled and downed the rest of his drink. He shrugged, “Found it in the back of my closet.”

You cackled, “I know you rent your suits.” In fact, you had accompanied him a few days ago to the shop and helped him pick it out. “You might as well buy one of your own since Tony thinks he’s Jay Gatsby.”

“He does like to throw parties,” he said. “Maybe you can come and help me pick out a suit sometime next week.”

“Sure,” you said. “Maybe you’ll agree to let me buy you lunch. I still owe you, you know?”

“Yeah, maybe. But I wouldn’t count on it” he chuckled. When you gave him an exasperated look, he shrugged and said, “What can I say? I like spoiling my best girl.”

You smiled and finished your drink, trying to hide the effect his words had on you.

 _Best girl_.

“Why aren’t you dancing? I thought there’d be a line of girls dying to dance with you.”

“I’m boring company,” he said simply.

“I like being around you.”

"Hmm, I'm sure you do," he said, doubtful.  

“I mean it!" And when his expression remained, you said, "James Buchanan Barnes, you are a catch. You’re honorable and loyal. And you’re- you’re very handsome.”

“You think so?” You nodded. Bucky’s eyes softened and he gave you a genuine smile.  How had you ignored the fluttery feeling in your chest for so long? “Would you like to dance-”

“How fitting,” a half-dunk Tony joked, “a red dress for the pyromaniac.”

You flinched at the moniker and living claws of flame appeared at your fingertips. You had met constant criticism from the media when you joined the Avengers, many of the critics had called you nothing more than an arsonist and pyromaniac. It stung.

You willed your flame to shimmering embers and silently cursed your lack of control over your abilities. Most times, you could manage your rage; less times, you could manage the inferno within. Besides, it was an effort to keep your temper in check when Tony started poking fun. You could certainly take a joke, but as people know, Tony can take things a bit too far. Especially when he was drinking.

You commanded your powers to stifle the embers. And they did.

Tony hadn’t seemed to notice the flame that had appeared as quickly as it has disappeared and sipped the amber liquid from his glass. You glanced at Bucky and you knew he had.

“Come on, man,” Bucky chided. “Don’t call her that. You know she hates when you do.”

“I can’t blame it on the alcohol,” he said, pointing his finger to the nearly empty glass in his hand. “This has been my only drink.”

 _Probably the only drink he hadn’t finished_ , you thought. Bucky looked at you, as if he were thinking the same thing.

Bucky crossed his arms and shot Tony a threatening glare.

“Sorry, though,” Tony slyly smiled, downing the rest of the alcohol and setting the glass on the counter. “I’ll watch what I say next time.” He walked back towards the dance floor.

“I hate it when he calls me that,” you said when he was out of sight.

“I know, doll."

Bucky knew all of your history, from the murder of your father that had awakened your latent fire-wielding powers; to the abandoned warehouse you had engulfed in flames with you still inside. You hadn’t bothered sugarcoating the bad parts. And when he told you of his past, he hadn’t either.

You took a seat besides Bucky at the bar stool, placing your hands by your tumbler glass. The cup had been empty for quite some time and you hadn’t bothered to ask for another.

Bucky’s hand hesitated before reaching towards your own. The touch was light- gentle.

Bucky stroked the back of your hand with his index finger. The calloused feel was strangely comforting. Even stranger, it felt familiar- like home.

Your eyes moved from your touching hands to his face. To your friend who fought beside you through so many dangers. To your friend who fought for you when no one else did.

He moved his hand on top of yours, his thumb rubbing circles. You so badly wanted his hand to hold your own. For his touch to consume the fire within.

You sighed contently. "I am very glad I met you, James-"

“When Steve said he hoped I brought my dancing shoes, I thought he was joking,” Wanda’s voice said over the party chatter. "Now my feet hurt!"

You tore your hand away from his.  

When you glanced back at Wanda, she wore an _I saw everything_ look.

“Excuse me,” you said and stood from the seat.

Bucky asked, “Save me a dance, doll?”

“Always,” you said.

You made way to the bathroom, Wanda following suit. Once in the bathroom, your friend checked if anyone was inside before she said, “You _like_ him.”

“Are you reading my thoughts?”

“Are you admitting you like him?” she quipped.

“Don’t read too much into it," you countered.

“I don’t have to,” she said. “ The lovey look you had on your face speaks for itself.”

“Lovey look?”

“It’s like-” she started and attempted to mimic the look. She gave you a lingering gaze and a few flutters of her eyelashes. It was the look she got when she saw chocolate cake. “Sometimes you get a dopey smile, too.”

“You're an ass.” You both roared in a laughter.

“And you're into Bucky.”

“We're just friends!"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! I had little expectations for anyone to read my work, even less for anyone to leave a kudos. Thank you!


	3. Harvest Festival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reassuring hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for this lame and inaccurate chapter.

Bucky didn’t know what to expect when you came into the training room near the end of his workout. Particularly because it seven in the morning on a weekend- you never woke up that early on days off.

But he certainly wasn’t expecting you to ask him to go with you to the harvest festival an hour north of the city.

“It was supposed to be a day trip with the girls,” you said. “But they got called into work last night.”

You gave him a look when he hesitated giving you an answer. “Ah, don’t give me the puppy eyes,” he said, smiling. He had a love/hate relationship with that look.

“You know I wouldn’t ask-”

“I know, doll,” he said, reassuring you. “Give me time to shower and change.”

And when you smiled, that’s when he realized he would go anywhere with you. And he did not mind the thought.

Hell, he realized he would not mind facing the dark so long as you were there with him.

* * *

 

You two were en route to the festival by eleven in the morning. You drove while Bucky sat in the passenger seat and played his music.

Every time you liked one of his songs, you’d say so and he’d reply with the band name. He remembered every song you liked and he would do you the favor of downloading them onto your iPod.

The festival was in full swing by the time you arrived a quarter after noon. The large field that was being used for parking was full of cars. Locating an empty spot was a  difficult find.

When you parked and emerged from the car into the frigid air, you were, for once, grateful of your power that kept you warm. Still, you dressed in a knitted sweater and jeans. You grabbed your wallet from the center console, stuffed the cash in your front pocket- a bad habit, you knew this. Bucky opened the back seat and slipped his jacket over the red Henley shirt he knew you liked so much. He liked it when you complimented him. The smile he gave you certainly told you so.

You tossed him the keys, along with your wallet and his too. He stuffed them in the backpack he carried on his shoulders. Although you weren’t planning on staying at the festival until closing time, you had packed the backpack with two water bottles, bug spray, and an extra sweater.

“Let me buy your admission ticket,” you told Bucky. You were pleasantly surprised when he gruffed out, _Fine_. You paid for two tickets and when you reached the entrance, you handed them to the gate attendant.

Live folk music and the chatter of excited people was heard as you moved through the festival. When you saw the picturesque field of pumpkins and the corn maze, you asked, “You brought your camera, right?”

He nodded and shrugged off the backpack onto one shoulder. “I packed it before we left.” He stuck his hand in the pack and pulled out his camera.

While he still kept journals, he liked to take pictures as often as he could. He would photograph anything and everyone good in his life. He had so many of you and the team. After all, they served him as recollections and reminders.

Although he’d never admit it, you knew he was afraid. So afraid Hydra would find him. So afraid of being so wiped of his memories that his brain would start chipping away. So afraid that next time, there would nothing left for him to remember.

Bucky slung the backpack over both his shoulders and the camera around his neck. You said, “I’m going to get some hot cider. You want some?”

Bucky nodded and followed you to the nearby concession stand. You ordered and paid before he could take out his wallet. He huffed, “I could have paid for it, you know.”

“Now you know how I feel every time you pay for my stuff,” you chuckled, handing him a paper cup full of cider. “Be prepared to not spend a single cent today, kid.”

“Don’t call me kid,” he said, struggling to keep his smile to himself. “I’m older than you. And maybe you can pay for my dessert.”

“I thought you kept cavity-free teeth by not eating sweets,” you said, taking small sips of your drink. “And I’m paying since I’m the one that dragged you out of the tower and I have cash- you don’t.”

Bucky rolled his eyes, alternating between blowing on his cider and taking sips.

You passed through a wide hall of stalls; some selling fresh produce, and others selling handmade trinkets. You saw the pie vendor at the end of the hall and made a beeline towards it.

Surprisingly, Bucky didn’t grumble when you handed him cash to pay for two slices of pumpkin pie and another two of apple dutch pie. Meanwhile, you were looking for a table to sit and found one under a tree covered in brilliant yellow foliage.

Bucky found you easily minutes later and handed you a slice of each pie. “You’re a bad influence on my eating habits.”

You forked a piece of apple pie into your mouth. “Oh, god. This is so good.” When Bucky took a bite of his own, he agreed wholeheartedly. He even went as far as to thank you for inviting him along.

You finished your pie at your pace, listening to the folk music that became increasingly louder. You were watching your surroundings: families with children, old couples, and everyone in between.

The click of Bucky’s camera brought your attention back to him. You quirked an eyebrow.  “You look pretty.” You thanked him and picked off the last of your plate, trying not to let your blush show. You were thankful, that even if it did show, Bucky didn’t mention it.

After cleaning off the table, you two set off to look at the art expo.

You gazed at the artwork and wished you had the talent to create something as beautiful. You looked down at your hands and thought of the fire that blazed within. You thought of the destruction they had brought into your life. Although you created fire from thin air, you created to destroy.

As if sensing your sudden gloom, Bucky rested his metal hand on the small of your back and guided you out.

"I'm sorry." You said, “I didn’t mean to ruin-”

“You didn’t,” he said, reassuring you. He brought his hands to the sides of your arms and began to move them, as is if rubbing the cold away. “I swear, baby, you didn’t.”

“I just- I wish I was normal sometimes,” you said. Of course, Bucky knew all this. He understood. “What I have is a curse.”

“If you wish you could have been normal, I can promise you that I do not.” Bucky’s calloused hands moved to cup your face. He was so gentle, so careful holding your face like you’re made of porcelain. “My world is so much better because you are in it and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Okay?”

“Okay.”

He grinned when you smiled, his hands dropping to his sides. “Now let’s go look around. After all, we did come all this way.”

You wondered why there were hummingbirds in your chest.

* * *

 

After getting lost in the corn maze for ten minutes- which admittedly was your fault- the two of  you looked through the pumpkin field and finished the day off by riding the Ferris wheel, much to Buck’s discontent. When you asked if he wanted to, he simply shrugged and said he would follow you anywhere. You believed him, too.

And throughout this time, Bucky took photographs of you. You smiled to yourself when he stopped someone to take a picture of the two of you together by the pumpkins.

Shades of gold and rose colored the horizon by the time you got off the Ferris wheel. The sky above had darkened considerably and you knew it was time to go home.

On your way out, you handed Bucky some cash and asked him if he could wait in line and buy two caramel apples while you used the restroom. You had said, _They're not for us. They're for Nat and Wanda._

Luckily for you, there was no line for the ladies’ restroom.

When you came out, Bucky was next in line to place his order. You stayed put nearby and brought out your cell phone. You had received a message from Natasha an hour ago.

Natasha's message read: **_We just got back. Did you end up finding anyone to go with you to the harvest festival?_ **

 

You replied: **_Yes, I went with Bucky._ **

 

Natasha sent you a winky face. Moments later she replied: **_Go get it, girl._ **

 

You answered: **_Dude, we’re just friends.Chill out or I’m throwing your caramel apple into the Hudson River._ **

 

You smiled triumphantly when Natasha didn’t reply back. You glanced up from your phone and saw Bucky waiting to pick up his order.

From the corner of your eye, you saw a man approach. He was near your age and a few inches taller than you. “Has anyone ever told you that you look Pyro? She's an Avenger.”

You were in fact, Pyro- the name you had begrudgingly taken on after Tony called you it so often that it stuck. You said, “I get that a lot actually, but no, I’m not. She’s taller than I am.” Steve had taught you to never say who you are or everyone will swarm you. _They’ll never let you leave_ , he said, _I learned the hard way_.

“Ah, I was hoping you were her,” the man grinned and you laughed politely. “Anyways, I’m Ben. Nice to meet you.”

You introduced yourself, using a fake variation of your real name. “Likewise, Ben.” He apologized for interrupting and left back towards his friends, shaking his head and saying, "It’s not her, guys."

You smiled at Bucky, who approached with your friend’s caramel apples. He frowned. “Who was that?”

“My boyfriend,” you joked. “Don’t you know you can’t leave me alone for ten minutes without having the boys run to me?”

“Was he bugging you?” Bucky asked, shrugging off the backpack from his shoulders and carefully placing the apples inside. While he was at it, he fished for the car keys. “He looked like he was flirting.”

You shook his head dismissively.

Once he found the keys, he fixed the pack back onto his shoulders and passed them to you as you walked past the exit.

“Wait,” you teased. “Is James Buchanan Barnes jealous?”

Bucky laughed and threw his arm around you. “Just gotta know if I’m losing my best girl is all.”

You felt the blush start at your ears when he didn’t deny it. “If you think that- you must not know me very well, Barnes.”

“Oh, doll, you’re mistaken,” he said, squeezing you tighter to his side. “I know you plenty.”

You challenged, “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.” He grinned. “I know that even if you try, you can’t sleep before eleven at night. I know that once you start watching those abused-dog-gets-happy-ending videos, you can’t stop even though they make you cry. Also, you put in a shitload of sugar in your coffee.”

“I do not!” You tilted your head back in laughter.

“Yes, you do! I counted 8 tablespoons one time,” he said as-a-matter-of-factually.

And when he dissolved into laughter, that's when you realized you loved moments like these. Moments where it was just you and him. Where you could forget all your burdens, even if only for just a moment.

"Ah, you know I love my best girl. Cavities and all," he said, squeezing your side one more time. You pinched his side hard enough he winced and let go.He asked for the keys as you approached the car.

“I’ll drive,” he said. “I want to listen to your music for a change.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave me comments. Whether you liked the chapter or if you want me to stop writing. :)


	4. Vermont

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blame it on the eggnog.

You had almost unpacked your duffle bag to stay home when the girls got called to a last minute mission in Tunisia, but Steve had insisted you come along. He said you would be able to relax or catch up on your reading during the weekend getaway in a cozy cabin. And when that hadn't convinced you, he said you'd have the best room in the place all to yourself. 

Bucky had smirked triumphantly as he had taken the passenger seat by Steve. Sam had frowned, setting himself behind him with you. His knees pressed the back of Bucky's seat and you knew this drive was going to be hell.

Despite the fact they hung out voluntarily- rather than being thrown together by circumstance- the pair quarreled easily and often of small matters. Up to when you first joined the team you thought bickering was something only children did and they soon outgrew it. The two grown men had proven you wrong.

Bucky angled his head back to look at Sam. He asked, "You good back there, buddy?"

Unamused, Sam asked, "Can you move your seat up?"

"No." Bucky’s reply is quick and brusque, but said with a smile as if he was itching for Sam to ask.

Sam kneed the back of Bucky’s seat, hard. And by the wince on his face you knew it hurt him more than it did the super soldier.

When Sam kicked the seat again, Bucky laughed and said, "You greatly underestimate my capacity for suffering."

Sam crossed his arms and frowned. It is amazing, you thought, that his face has not wrinkled.

"Scoot forward, Bucky. This bird has got to spread his wings," you said, thinking it would be a shame to let the remaining hour in the car turn sour. Especially for such a small thing.

Bucky sighed, but moved his seat forward nonetheless.

"Yeah, that's right. The Falcon needs his space," Sam said, smiling as he stretched his legs. He gave you a nod in appreciation and said, "If I knew you had a leash on Barnes-"

"Shut up they only invited you to fend off the bears," Bucky huffed.

"Quit it," Steve demanded. If he weren’t driving on such a busy road, he’d pinch the bridge of his nose and sigh. "I talked to you guys about this countless times. No fighting this weekend."

Sam quirked an eyebrow when Steve took an exit off the main road. "Where are we going?"

"He's pulling over to discipline you two for fighting," you said.

"No," Steve said, but chuckled despite himself. His hands loosened their grip from the steering wheel and relaxed when he neared the gasoline station. "I'm stopping for gas."

When the car came to a stop Bucky grabbed his wallet and said he was heading inside the store to get snacks. Steve asked for trail mix, undid his seat belt and got up, leaving the car door ajar as he started to put fuel into the car. Sam tried handing him two dollar bills for a chocolate bar, but he waved him off.

Bucky asked you, “Hot chocolate?”

You smiled. “You read my mind. Can you-”

“I’ll see if they have donuts here,” Bucky said, knowing you made a habit of eating the treat along with a hot beverage. You brought out your wallet, but he said, “I got it, doll.” He stepped out of the car’s threshold and walked towards the convenience store.

“If I had a dollar for every time he called you _doll_ , I’d be as rich as Stark,” Sam said once Bucky shut the door and was out earshot.

“It’s his thing,” you said. You remember being faintly surprised when he first used the moniker he was so fond of in the 40s. So faintly, in fact, that you never questioned it. The word had risen unto his lips so naturally, it seemed as if the four-letter word was created solely for you. As if he had been calling _doll_ his entire life.

“He only calls you that,” Sam said. “It’s his thing... for you.”

Steve stepped over the threshold, and sat in the the driver’s seat. He stuffed the receipt in his wallet and asked, “What are you guys talking about?”

“Man,” Sam said, pausing for a moment to send you a grin, “Do you think Barnes has a thing for her?”

“Oh, yeah. Definitely, ” Steve said without hesitation. “I’ve actually been meaning to talk to you about that,” he started and half turned in his seat, “What are your intentions? Are they serious or-”

“Oh my god,” you muttered. You rubbed your eyes in attempt to hide the blush that crept up your neck. “I don’t know how many times I have to say we’re just friends.”

“For now,” Sam joked.

And it wasn’t like you hadn’t thought about it. You had. “I resent you two,” you said instead.

“Here he comes,” Sam said hurriedly. “Steve, how much you want to bet he’s going to call her _doll_ within the first minute?”

Before Steve could answer, Bucky opened the passenger door and sat down with a plastic bag in hand. He tossed a bag of trail mix to him and a chocolate bar to Sam.

Bucky cautiously handed you a carton cup along with a paper bag containing what you hoped was a donut. “Careful, doll, it’s hot.”

While Sam hid his snicker, Steve smiled so hard his face might have cracked. His grin broke and he barked a short laugh. Bucky ignored them and said he had added marshmallows.

“Shut it, Steve,” you hissed and took your stuff from Bucky’s hands. “Eat your dad trail mix.”

As Steve drove on the main road, you fixed your gaze on the scenery outside and sipped on your hot chocolate until you arrived at your weekend getaway.

After setting your belongings inside the two bedroom cabin, the four of you set on a two mile hike. On the way back, you had lost your footing and hurt your ankle. You had tried to play it off, after all, you had managed to walk straight with worse. Bucky had noticed and asked, “Why are you limping?”

“I’m swaggering,” you had informed him.

“You look like you’re wearing a dirty diaper,” Bucky had said.

How charming, you thought.

And this was the guy you had a crush on.

* * *

 

Hours later, your three friends had left into town to find somewhere to eat and you had been too tired to go. Instead, you enjoyed the warmth of the fireplace you had set ablaze an hour ago.

You had unfolded the pullout sofa, retrieved the spare sheets and blankets from the closet by the entrance and spread them across the bed. You grabbed a few extra pillows from your room after deciding to wrap yourself in a blanket and relax until the boys came back.

Three knocks sounded at the front entrance, you stood up and opened the door. Bucky stood there, holding a take-out box, eggnog and a bottle of brandy. He walked past the threshold and placed the three items on the wooden table beside the sofa while you grabbed two glass cups from the kitchen.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you get up,” Bucky said. “How’s your ankle doing?”

“The swelling has considerably gone down,” you replied. “Where our other two friends?”

“There's an ice rink in town,” he said as the two of you sat on the mattress, leaning against the armrest. "Also, Steve was hellbent on finding a horse drawn sleigh rides."

You started eating from the take-out box as Bucky grabbed the brandy and eggnog and mixed them together in your respective cups.

He handed you your glass as you ate. “What kind of meat is this?” you asked.

“Venison,” Bucky answered, smiling as he drank from his drink. When you grimaced, he asked, “You don’t like it?”

“I don’t like it,” you said but continued eating the gamey meat. You drank the brandy infused eggnog in between bites and joked, “The drink helps cleanse my palate.”

Bucky snorted a laugh. “You do realize I have seen you eat dinner rolls off room service trays in hotel hallways, right?”

"I was drunk and it happened once!”

“Twice,” Bucky argued. He broke into a grin. Unlike his face, his grin was as boyish as ever.

“Steve told me he saw you drop a pie onto the floor,” you said. “And you still served everyone a slice.”

“That’s not as bad as you.”

“You dropped it face down, Bucky,” you said, laughing.

He finished his eggnog and placed the glass on the floor. “What _else_ did Steve say?”

You felt the warmth of the liquor strike something bold in your chest. “He said you thought I was the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen.”

“Remind me to throttle him when he gets back,” Bucky said. He attempted to conceal his flush by rubbing the stubble on his face.

“You’re not denying it?”

“I’m not denying anything, doll,” he said. The sound of his voice was warm. It made you feel like you had swallowed sunlight. But then again, it could have been the liquor. “Did that meatball say anything else?”

“That you're a sucker for butterscotch candy,” you said, “and if I'm clever, I'd train you with them."

Bucky roared in laughter. The kind where he clenched his eyes shut and placed his hand over his rapid heartbeat. The kind where you couldn’t help but to laugh along as well.

You shifted in your seat on the sofa mattress, the creaking and racket of the springs making you cringe. You said, “This bed is terrible.”

“I’ve slept on worse,” Bucky said.

You weren’t certain what made you say it. Was it desire? Was it the brandy-added eggnog? Either way you felt a thrill go through you when said: “I-If you want, you can sleep on my bed.”

You quickly added, “Platonically, of course.”

“Of course,” Bucky said slowly and softly. “Platonically.”

“So you will?”

A beat passed. Then another. And another.

“I-I couldn’t do that to you, doll. It wouldn’t be decent or honorable for me to sleep in the same bed with you.”

Your heart ached. You didn’t want decent. You didn’t want honorable. You knew what you wanted. And you wanted him. You wanted him more than you’ve ever wanted anyone.

But your feelings didn’t matter until he was ready.

Bucky was barely putting himself back together and you didn’t want to ask something of him that he wasn’t ready to give.

“Sorry, I’m not thinking straight,” you said, shaking your head. “The alcohol is making me tipsy. I think I’m going to head to bed.”

Bucky’s calloused hand brushed over yours for a moment. He didn’t stop you when you eased off the bed.

“Goodnight,” he said.

“Goodnight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TO THE READERS:  
> Send in suggestions for the last chapter of this book! Should you and Bucky get a happy ending? Should you wait for Bucky to heal? I have ideas but I'm not sure you'd like them.  
> Comment or send asks on my tumblr: woahziall
> 
> PS: Very sorry I took a month to update (It is nearly 4am but I am determined to finish). And also very sorry for this crappy chapter.


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